Why whisky is cool

Why whisky is so cool

1. Because you don’t cool it down,

just like a chopper engine or your hot girlfriend.

Remember! No cooling down - it’s cool.

2. Because sissies don’t drink whisky

(well, except Beckham and Biebs)

'I drink and sneak out without paying'

 'I drink grain from perfume-like bottles'

'I'm not a sissy, I drink it all'

3. You can put it on your t-shirt

Your granny is not cool - you don’t put her on your t-shirt.

Whisky’s cool that’s why you put it on your t-shirt.

4. Because monks drink whisky 

and monks are cool

 

actually, agents are also cool

5. Because it makes you think you are cool

whatever you do: nose it

or dye your hair 

6. Because it is a cool thing to dream about

Other cool things to dream about

7. Because it makes you badass

Other things that make you a badass:

Metallica

A punk girlfriend

A vial of mana

8. Things cooler than whisky

Non-Scottish bartender with a kilt

Space whisky